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12 March 2008 @ 07:30 pm
(If Only I Don't) Bend and Break [30 Rock; Jack/Liz]  
TITLE: (If Only I Don't) Bend and Break
FANDOM: 30 Rock


Jack feigns a smile and reaches for Liz's hand, squeezing it so tight Liz can't let go (dammit) while C.C. approaches.

Her smile is just as fake as Jack's and Liz almost thinks that they might be made for each other. Almost. "Jack, hi. I didn't expect to see you here."

"Good evening, Celeste," Jack returns cordially.

"Liz, how are you?" C.C. smiles at her, attempting to keep things light.

"I'm great, thanks. I'm--"

"She's my live-in girlfriend," Jack jumped in, and Liz would've elbowed him in the crotch if she could've. "We're together now."

She doesn't miss the way C.C.'s eyebrows fly up. "Really? Wow. Well, that's great for you two. Just great."

Liz really hopes she's lying. If not, she might throw up. Being a Donaghy girlfriend, from the look of it, is a very demanding job.

And painful. Jack's totally crushing her hand. So, she does what any mature adult would do. She kicks him in the shins.

"Ow! God." But it works; Jack drops her hand and she's finally allowed to massage the feeling back into it. He nods at his ex. "It was wonderful seeing you again."

"Yes, same to you." She smiles again and nods, clutching her pocketbook a little tighter. Liz has always liked C.C., though secretly never found her to be very pretty. "I should be getting to my table now."

"Right. Okay."

Liz watches her walk away and wonders how things could've been a little bit more awkward. She answers that thought quickly -- if Bianca had been there too. The last thing she needed was to get into a rumble with two of Jack's exes.

"I apologize for that, Lemon, that was awkward," he murmurs under his breath so the Republican dudes at his table don't hear him. Not that it matters; they're still talking about Johnny Mac and... maybe something about golf or hookers. She's not sure. Any mention of the term 'nine iron' is immediately followed with 'if you know what I mean.' So it really could be either one.

"You owe me for this, Jack. I can't believe you're pretending we're dating again."

"Well I can assure you C.C. is not nearly as violent as Bianca."

Oddly enough, that's a little comforting.

"She does bite, though," he warns her next, "So just be careful should she corner you."

It's at that point that Liz needs her third champagne.


After the third champagne, Jack suggests they hit the dance floor. Obviously he's really eager to prove to C.C. that he's over her. With Bianca, he was too depressed to do any kind of dancing, even when she'd suggested it. Now he's dragging her out there against her will and shocking her into compliance with his hand so low on her back he's practically grabbing her ass. She thinks maybe she should slap him. But she doesn't.

The first song they dance to is a Michael Buble version of Van Morrison's "Moondance." Liz enjoys herself thoroughly, because the up-tempo swing feel gives Jack the brilliant idea to spin her. So he does. And that combined with the champagne sends her flying. It's pretty awesome.

"Enjoying yourself, Lemon?" Jack asks as he spins her back into him.

She giggles. Man, she needs to slow down on the champagne. "Yes. How'd you get to be such a good dancer?"

"Ah, mother insisted that I learn." He pulls her in and steps lightly, nimbly, with her to the rhythm of the song.

"Go Colleen!" Liz congratulates the absent matriarch of the Donaghy brood. "This is great!"

Jack spins her a few more times before the song blends into a slow number. It takes Liz a second before she figures out it's a Magnet cover of her favorite Bob Dylan song. The Obama camp has some pretty decent musical tastes, she decides.

Jack takes her hand and starts to pull her close and Liz panics -- puts on her panic smile. "Oh, so I suppose this is where we have to pretend to be a couple, huh?" she exhales nervously as Jack's hand slides down her back.


"Okay, no problem, I can do this." It's only a few seconds later when she realizes, "Oh boy, wow, really can't do this."

"Relax, Liz, and put your free arm over my shoulders," Jack murmurs in her ear, and she closes her eyes against the sound of his voice and just does what he says.

They're swaying under-tempo from the song and Liz keeps her eyes closed, fearing that if she opens them and C.C. catches her gaze, the jig will be up. She hears Jack sighing a few moments later, though, and is curious enough to open her eyes and look up at him. "What?"

"I hate this hippie-dippie, 'lay across my big brass bed' music. It's insufferable."

Liz lets herself hide her chuckle against his shoulder, sliding her hand to the nape of his neck while they continue to dance, her other hand held captive in his. "It's Bob Dylan, Jack. And correct me if I'm wrong, but... didn't Al Gore say something about you being ultra-liberal way-back-when?" She smirks.

"Don't get smirky with me, Lemon. Those days are far behind me. And even then I didn't enjoy this song in its original form. It sounded like a luau."

"Well this one doesn't, and this is a hippie-dippie fundraiser." She raises her eyebrows. "So... deal with it."

"Point taken."

So he shuts up and they dance a little longer, still under-tempo -- far too slow and romantic for how unromantic this night is supposed to be, Liz thinks. But that doesn't stop her from leaning her forehead on Jack's shoulder.

What? It's the champagne.


Songs referenced: Moondance \ Michael Buble and Lay Lady Lay \ Magnet feat. Gemma Hayes

{x-posted to jack_liz and 30_rock}
Kat: daisies_forpele on March 13th, 2008 01:07 am (UTC)
"Jack's totally crushing her hand. So, she does what any mature adult would do. She kicks him in the shins."
Haha, so perfectly Liz. This was great! Keep them coming :)
a.: olive; dances like no one's watchingregalish on March 16th, 2008 04:45 pm (UTC)
Haha! Thank you! More to come on this one soon :)
Brittanicus Spatulaire: Hillarycjmscully on March 13th, 2008 01:27 am (UTC)

The end was really cute, not gonna lie.

and LMAO at "nine iron"

haha I love this story, can't wait for the next part!
a.: gillian; in that gorgeous green sweaterregalish on March 16th, 2008 04:46 pm (UTC)
Aww, thanks! I'm glad you liked this! I'll hopefully have more of this one soon!
(Deleted comment)
a.: tina; as tinkregalish on March 16th, 2008 04:47 pm (UTC)
Heee, thank you muchly! I love it when Jack & Liz "play house" too :D

They don't do it nearly enough on the show, though. *sigh*

Anyway... more to come soon!
mybaloney on March 13th, 2008 03:19 am (UTC)
"She does bite, though," he warns her next, "So just be careful should she corner you."
Great line! Love all your stories. You write Jack and Liz so well. Looking forward to the next installment. Keep it up!
a.: liz; lemonregalish on March 16th, 2008 04:48 pm (UTC)
Haha, thanks very much! I'm glad you enjoy my fics, because I certainly enjoy writing them. Next installment should hopefully be ready soon :)
(Anonymous) on March 13th, 2008 03:29 am (UTC)
Seriously I am loving this fic! More please! :)
a.: jack/liz; followshipregalish on March 16th, 2008 04:48 pm (UTC)
Thank you! :)

More to come soon!
courtney_mudie7: 30Rock: that is awesomecourtney_mudie7 on March 13th, 2008 03:40 am (UTC)
so awesome! well written.. you got liz and jack perfect (as always)

looking forward to more chapters:)
a.: liz; and her ham napkinregalish on March 16th, 2008 04:49 pm (UTC)
Aww, thanks so much! I hope to have more of this one soon :)
van_canucksvan_canucks on March 13th, 2008 06:13 am (UTC)
Squee. This fic just melted my cold cold heart. :)

Oh Liz. Oh Jack. Just do it, already.

a.: jack/liz; 10 secondsregalish on March 16th, 2008 04:49 pm (UTC)
Haha! I agree, Jack and Liz definitely need to hook up. Glad you're enjoying this fic; more soon! :)
(Deleted comment)
a.: jack/liz; balconyregalish on March 16th, 2008 04:52 pm (UTC)
Thank you very much! Glad you enjoyed :)
Dayna: 30 rock; jack/liz; elevatordaynawashere on March 13th, 2008 07:15 pm (UTC)
GUH. I'm SO excited for more. You have their voices down so well.
a.: jack/liz; two sides of the same coinregalish on March 16th, 2008 04:53 pm (UTC)
Heee! Thanks so much! I do enjoy writing their dialogue; it's totally unique in terms of rhythm and stuff.

More soon! :)
Cross Word: Conan Forehead!Lovegoodtoast on March 14th, 2008 03:26 am (UTC)
I think I may be a fan of the short chapters, too. They're like little Jack/Liz snacks!

Aw, C.C. I feel a little bad for her. She was lovely in the show, and I wouldn't mind if she came back for a bit. Hint hint? I hope she comes back in the story ;) Subtle, aren't I?

Drunk Liz is always a welcome. She's adorable regularly, but give her some booze? AWWWWWW *melts into puddle on floor*
a.: jack/liz; a decent setregalish on March 16th, 2008 04:54 pm (UTC)
Hehe, the short chapters are fun for everybody, that's good to know ;)

And C.C. will definitely be brought back into the story, fear not -- we haven't seen the last of her.

OH, drunk Liz. She's just extra adorable, isn't she? Especially while drunk dialing :D

More soon!
stephen@charleneforever.com: 30 rock: jack/liz & you're welcomemichellek on March 14th, 2008 05:34 am (UTC)
I heartily endorse this chapter! Funny and kind of adorable in a Jack-and-Liz way.
a.: jack/liz; two sides of the same coinregalish on March 16th, 2008 04:55 pm (UTC)
Why thank you muchly, m'dear! Hehehe. Glad you're liking this. I hope to have more of this one soon, and the third part of "Eff Buddies" is going up shortly!
bitebyte: hanleiabitebyte on March 15th, 2008 01:59 am (UTC)
I like it because they probably would play pretty alright music at a Obama fundraiser. :)
a.: liz; beautyregalish on March 16th, 2008 04:56 pm (UTC)
Y'know, you're right! They probably would :)

Glad you liked this! More soon.

I love your icon, btw. Han/Leia ♥!!
I work, I function like i'm a girl.: MSRokelay on March 16th, 2008 05:25 am (UTC)
great fic, i'm really enjoying it so far
i don't see CC will remain calm for much longer, is she?
a.: jack/liz; black & whiteregalish on March 16th, 2008 04:57 pm (UTC)
Thanks so much! There will be much more C.C. coming up :)
csiAngel: 30 Rock J/Lcsiangel on March 16th, 2008 08:18 pm (UTC)
Still loving it! It's so perfectly them; I can just picture the whole thing. And I feel the urge to pat Liz on the head gently and say 'Yes, yes, of course it's the champagne' :-)
a.: jack/liz; two sides of the same coinregalish on March 17th, 2008 12:15 am (UTC)
Heeee! Thanks, Jac! I am such a sucker for Jack/Liz slow-dancing, I really am. I'm pretty sure I'd pass out if I ever saw them slow dancing on the actual show (which will never happen, but hey! A girl can dream).

And LOL, Liz in denial is absolutely adorable, so of course she has to be a part of this fic.

More soon! ♥
madscullyx13: Rosemadscullyx13 on November 10th, 2008 06:02 am (UTC)
:) LOve these