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10 March 2008 @ 07:14 pm
Bedside Angel [CSI; Grissom/Catherine]  
TITLE: Bedside Angel
PAIRING: Grissom/Catherine
SPOILERS: "Inside the Box" (3x23)


I feel my head move, and can vaguely recall the sound of my own voice, moaning as if just awakening from a long night's sleep. I'm aware of the fact that I'm laying down, and I'm also aware of the heavy, sterile smell that surrounds me like a cloud. As I hear a steady beep, I can feel myself smile. I can hear again. Not that I'd been completely deaf before... but I was mere sound bytes away from it. I shift in my bed, still surrounded by darkness, and suddenly feel a warm hand in mine, squeezing it. Then I hear a voice... a beautiful, wonderful, angelic voice. A voice that I know I've heard countless times before, but can't seem to vividly place.

"Gil..." the musical voice calls to me, and I smile again. It must be my guardian angel. I'm not a religious man, but have complete faith in the fact that there's someone out there who's looking out for me... who's loving me and caring for me without my conscious knowledge. And she's here with me now. I can feel her. I can feel the softness and warmth of her tiny hand in mine. I can smell her sweet scent... a mixture of lilies and peonies swirl around my nostrils and for a moment I feel euphoria. I feel excited and at peace all at the same time.

"Gil..." I hear her call again, and my hand drops hers to reach out, blindly searching for her face. I'm fully aware of the fact that I can open my eyes anytime and see her face... but what I'm also aware of is the fact that without one sense, all four others are augmented. And I'm enjoying this too much right now to just open my eyes, and risk leaving this dream-land I'm in.

I feel the softness of her cheek against my hand and sigh, then feel the vibration against my palm as she giggles, her hand covering mine a moment later. "Gil, I think you're enjoying those meds a little too much," I hear her tease, and I chuckle.

"Angels aren't supposed to be so sarcastic," I tell her, and this is when I hear a slight gasp. Am I not supposed to know that she's my guardian angel?

"Gil..." she murmurs, and I wonder if I'm in heaven. If I could hear my name from my guardian angel's lips every moment for the rest of my life, what a wonderful life it would be. "Open your eyes."

She actually wants me to leave this paradise I'm currently residing in? Reality can't be as beautiful as what I'm experiencing now... so why does she want me to leave? Still, I know I'm supposed to do what my guardian angel tells me to... she
is the one looking out for me and loving me, after all. So, ever-so-slowly, I open my eyes. When I do, everything's a blur. Was it those meds my angel had spoken of? Or just a side-effect from having my eyes closed for so very long? I can't be sure at the moment, so for now, I enjoy the fuzziness.

I can see her. She's sitting beside my bed, her hand still covering mine as it rests on her face. Aha! I knew you were an angel! I can see your halo! A brilliant, white light illuminates the golden strands of her hair, and I'm mesmerized. Now I almost wish to see clearly... my angel must be absolutely beautiful. "Angel..." I call to her, and she emits another soft giggle.

I see her face become larger in my line of vision... she's leaning in closer. I'm now staring into two blurry pools of iridescent blue. They glimmer with a deep aqua color, and for a moment it's as if I'm staring into the waters of the Caribbean. "Gil..."

There she goes, saying my name again... only this time, she sweeps a hand through my hair and leans so close I can feel her breath on my lips. "Have you been here the whole time?" I ask her, still willing my eyes to focus. I want to clearly see my angel's beauty... for if her eyes and golden hair are any indication, she must be some pretty stiff competition for the Venus de Milo.

"Of course," she replies in a sigh, and a puff of air hits my lips. I can feel her smile as her fingers play with the hair curled at my temples. "I wanted to be the first one you saw when you woke up."

"Well I'm glad that you're here," I whisper, and my vision starts coming slowly back into focus.

They are currently centered on a pair of lips... full lips that shine in the sunlight. I want to kiss her, I want to kiss my angel... can I? "Angel?"

I watch those lips curve into a smile, and her voice emerges from them, soft as a whisper, "Yes, Gil?"

"May I kiss you?"

I hear her suck in a breath and watch as her blurry form leans back slightly. "What?"

"Only for a moment," I beg, "Please."

I feel her smile once again, and that warm, wonderful hand sweeps through my curls once more as she leans forward. "Just this once," she whispers, and her lips descend onto mine.

It's sweet, it's intoxicating, it's heaven on earth.... but from a guardian angel, what else could it be? My hand wanders to the back of her angelic crown of golden hair as I allow myself to fully caress her lips with mine... to taste them... and suddenly I'm struck by a tactile memory. These lips. I've tasted these lips before.... felt them against mine years in the past.

As she pulls away from me, my vision returns completely in one swift jolt, and I'm dumped back into reality. "Catherine..."


She pulled away, missing the taste of his lips, missing the feel of them grasped between her own, but knowing that the situation was a fallicy. She watched his eyes as realization clouded the blues, and a half smile escaped her lips in a sheepish nature. "I guess I kinda kissed those meds away, huh?" Her eyes focused on the beige thermal blanket draped across his legs, and her nervous fingers toyed with the material.

"Cath..." he whispered, fingertips to his lips. "Did we just...?"

She nodded knowingly, blinking slowly. "You asked me to kiss you."

"Oh God..."

"And you kept calling me 'Angel,'" she added.

"Oh God." He frowned thoughtfully as the tip of his tongue peeked out between his lips, and he bit down on it. "I'm so sorry."

She shrugged nonchalantly. "Hey, I understand," she replied, "The meds were makin' ya a little goofy. Besides..." She leaned forward, her elbows on her thighs, and grinned at him. "It's not like we haven't done it before."

"Yeah, well... we weren't inebriated this time," he retorted, rolling his eyes to the ceiling.

"Well... I wasn't, at least," she chuckled. Her gaze met his, and for a moment they swam in the sea of the other's eyes. Catherine offered a small smile. "Gil, don't worry about it." Her shoulders shrugged once more as she clasped her hands, still leaning slightly forward. "I know it didn't mean anything, so we'll just forget about it."

"Yeah..." His eyes focused on the beige fabric in front of him, seeing through it as he relived the feel of her lips against his. Not mean anything? How could it not mean anything? Yet... the even bigger question... how could he tell her it meant everything? "Right."

"So..." Wanting to change the subject quickly, she gestured to him. "How's your hearing?"

He smiled. "Back, completely."

"Gil, that's great!" She sighed. "I had been so worried about you, ever since you told me you were going to even attempt surgery." She shrugged. "Actually, since I found out about your condition."

"Well I'm all better now, Cath," he assured her. "And the team shall remain none-the-wiser."

A vertical crease appeared between her eyebrows. "You're not telling the kids?" she asked, her tone laced with a hint of sadness.

"No, why would I?"

"Well, because... shouldn't they know?"

He sighed. "Cath, you know how I am about revealing things about my personal life. I mean," he gestured to her, "Look how long it took me to tell you! And you're my best friend!" He shook his head. "No, I think the team should remain in the dark about this."

She shrugged her response. "That's your decision, I guess." She then glanced down at her watch. "Oh, shoot. I gotta get going. Gotta pick Lindsey up from school in a little bit."

He waved toward the door, smiling his understanding at her. "Go. It was very thoughtful of you to stay this whole time... I'm very grateful."

She grinned, rising to her feet. "Even if I'm not the beautiful angel you were dreaming of?"

He offered a half smile in return, a mysterious twinkle in those boyish eyes. "I never said you weren't."

She broke into a slow, warm smile as she stared into his eyes, then reluctantly tore her gaze from his to grab her purse. "I'll pick you up when you're ready to be released, okay?"

"Which will hopefully be by tomorrow morning."

"Okay," she sighed, "Good." She paused, her hand on his shoulder as she once more delved into his royal blue irises. "So, I'm gonna go..."

He returned the intense gaze. "Okay."

She smiled, and leaned forward to plant a kiss on his forehead, at the exact moment that he tilted his face upwards, expecting a kiss on the cheek. Their lips only inches away, they searched each other's eyes awkwardly, finally smiling at each other and settling for a chaste kiss on the lips... one that ended far too early for both. "Bye," she whispered, and with a flick of her golden locks, she was gone, leaving Gil to smile at the door, and at the lily-and-peony scented trail left in her wake.


"Cath, thanks for driving me home," he told her, smiling gently at her from the passenger seat of her Denali.

She grinned in response, her eyes hidden behind her sunglasses. "You don't have to thank me, Gil. I was happy to do it. Although," she added, "I was a little disappointed to see you weren't wearing your hospital gown anymore."

He arched an eyebrow, eyes shifting suspiciously. "And why is that?"

Her grin widened, and a soft giggle escaped her lips as her cheeks began to flush. "Ahh... no reason," she finally sighed.

He rolled his eyes. "Come on Cath, you can't just bait me and then let it drop."

She turned to smile at him. "Well, let's just say... you look cute in a hospital gown."

He made a face, his forehead wrinkling, before he shrugged it off and turned to look out the window. Her voice drew his attention back to her... "Especially when you're walking away from me."

When realization hit him, his jaw dropped slightly. "Catherine..." he murmured in shock.

"What?" she practically shrieked in her own defense, "You were walking away from me and the back of your hospital gown was open. Where was I supposed to look?" She chuckled, shaking her head. "You've got a nice ass, Gil."

His eyes widened, and for a brief moment he wondered whether he was offended or flattered. He finally settled on the latter... it was Catherine, after all. "Thank you," he softly replied. While turning back to look out the window, he felt his eyelids begin to droop, his head following soon after.


He slowly brought his head up to look at her. "I'm tired," he sighed, in answer to her unasked question.

"Well don't worry, we're almost home," she replied. "Then you can get some rest."

"Good..." he breathed, his heart fluttering at her words, at her use of the word 'we.' And with those thoughts running happily through his head, he leaned his head back against the seat and let darkness consume him.


Catherine somehow managed to wake Gil up long enough to get him into his townhouse, guide him to his room, and allow him to flop onto the bed. But not before he unbuckled his pants and slid them to his ankles.

She now fought to hide the full-on laugh threatening to burst forth as she eyed his current state: Face down on his bed, glasses tossed up toward his pillow... his legs hanging over the edge of the bed with his pants down around his ankles. "Ladybugs," she commented, her eyes roaming the pattern of his boxers and that fabulous ass of his. "How appropriate."

She then sighed, crouching down at the foot of the bed to untie his shoes and remove them, along with his socks and his pants, setting them carefully on his chair near the door. Wandering around to the other side of the bed, she hooked both hands under his arms and dragged him up to his pillow, leaving him in his polo shirt. She then straightened up, smiling down at his sleeping form... admiring the innocence hugging his features.

As she turned to head out to the livingroom, her eyes caught on the rust-colored prescription bottle she'd set on the dresser. "Shit," she whispered, "His pain killers." She rushed back to his side and shook him. "Gil... Gil, you gotta wake up for a sec. You need to take your pain meds."

He groaned and grunted into his pillow, his arm flying backward to swat her away. She made a face, swatting him back. "Oh, quit bein' a baby, it'll only take a second. Then you can head back into dream-land with Heidi Klum or whoever you dream about," she quipped, unsure if she really wanted to know who Gil dreamed of.

His voice came out muffled from the pillow as he let out an agonized slur, "If I told you I was dreaming of you, would you let me sleep?"

She laughed. "Fat chance... and no, I wouldn't." For good measure, she leaned forward and slapped him hard on his butt, causing him to bolt upright. "Now get that cute ass outta bed and take your pills already!" She sighed exasperatedly as he made a fuss about it, and she shook her head at him. "Geez, you're a pain in the ass."

He pouted, popping a pill into his mouth and heading for the bathroom in search of water. "I thought you said I had a nice ass."

She smirked. "You have a nice ass, but you are a pain the ass." When he emerged from the bathroom, she shoved him lightly. "Now go take a nap. You need to rest some more."

"Yeah, yeah..." he muttered, grabbing his shirt by the hem and yanking it over his head... tossing it haphazardly onto the chair occupied by the rest of his clothes seconds later.

Catherine gasped inaudibly at the sight of his bare chest, and she turned her eyes away when he looked to her in confusion. "Yeah, so umm... I'll just be out in the livingroom reading... or something," she replied.

"Okay..." he said slowly, drawing the word out as he continued to eye her warily.

"Yell when you're up," she told him, willing herself to meet his eyes and only his eyes. "I'll make you something to eat then."

He nodded. "Sounds good," he replied, then proceeded to flop face-down on his bed once more, dozing off within seconds.

She paused at the door, just watching him sleep for a moment, before sighing and shaking her head at him. "Gil, Gil, Gil," she whispered, and set off for the livingroom.


I can feel my bed move, and it's not me that's the cause of it. She's back. My guardian angel, my Catherine, came back to me. It's probably time for me to get up already, but I don't want to. Especially not now that her fingers are making their way through my hair. No way. "Gil..."

"I love how you say my name," I tell her, falling in love with the state of euphoria I'm currently residing in. Lucky enough for me, I get to live in this euphoria every four to six hours for another ten days.

I hear her giggle, and slide closer to me. She's definitely laying on her side. "Gil, time to get up," she tells me. "Are you hungry?"

"Not for food," I reply, and reach out to pull her close. Should I open my eyes yet? And if I do, what look will I see on her face? Disgust? Pity? Or will I perhaps get lucky and see an expression of love? "Right now, I'm just craving you."

I hear her giggle, and this is not the response I'd been hoping for. I slowly open my eyes and find myself staring directly into hers, a smile edging across those wonderful lips I'd kissed only a day ago. She searches my eyes. "What's with you lately? Is it the meds?"

"Doubtful," I hear myself reply... and why the hell am I being so bold? I'm gonna end up with a shattered heart in a matter of moments anyway, so why am I speeding the process along? Still, I can't help but pull her closer and continue, "Because when the meds wear off, I'll still be in love with you." Oh, now I've done it. She'll be vaulting off that bed in a matter of seconds.


She froze in his arms, stunned by what he'd revealed. "You're... in love with me?" she asked, left breathless by the confession.

He stared into her eyes and for a moment she wondered if it really was the medication that was making him do this. "Yes," he replied simply, as if it had been a well-known fact for ages. "You never knew?"

She raised her eyebrows. "No..."

He shrugged nonchalantly, an almost dreamy smile crossing the lips she'd held with her own a mere day ago. "Well, now you know," he told her. "So now it's up to you to make the decision." He wrapped his strong arm completely around her waist, pulling her flush against him. "Do you want me to hold on, or let you go?"

She searched his eyes for the longest of moments, her fists against his smooth chest almost as a reflex... to keep her far enough away so she could search his eyes. The royal blue hues only sparkled his sentiments back at her, reflecting his declaration of love and magnifying it by ten. When she saw everything in them she needed to, she let out a breath, lips easing into a smile as her hands reached to cup his face. It was then that she leaned in to kiss him, mouths tasting and caressing.

Gil inhaled sharply through his nose and moved his hands to her back, pressing her closer before opting to wrap his arms completely around her waist... flipping her gently onto her back. She hummed beneath his lips, having craved this kind of attention since their kiss in the hospital. "Gil..." she whispered, and he hummed at the sound of his name on her lips.

"Yes?" He moved his kisses to her neck, trailing them down toward her shoulder.

"I love you too," she murmured, and this caused him to pull back to look into her eyes.

"You do?" he asked, amazed, and with a subtle nod, he had his answer, bursting into a grin immediately.

Their hands moved to caress and fondle tenderly... love and respect ruling their actions moreso than lust and desire. "Catherine," he mumbled against her neck while reaching down to grasp the hem of her shirt.

Now it was her turn to hum at the sound of her own name from his beloved lips. "Hmm?"

He pulled away, staring into her eyes. "I wanna make love to you."

Butterflies unleashed, her eyebrows raised. Never before had six simple words held so much meaning... never had they had so much power over her. All she could do was whisper, "Okay," then assist him in removing her shirt while he turned the lights out.


There's no doubt in my mind, now. She is my guardian angel. Like I said, I'm not a religious man, but have complete faith in the fact that there's someone out there who's looking out for me... who's loving me and caring for me without my conscious knowledge. And she's here with me now. I can feel her. I can feel the softness of her naked flesh pressed against my body. I can feel the rise and fall of her chest as she sleeps peacefully. And now, with my eyes wide open, I see her for everything she is.... and that, quite simply, is everything. She's the world. She's heaven and earth and everything in between encompassed in a golden heart... an angelic face... and yes, a smokin' body.

She's my soulmate... my guardian angel... my Catherine. And she's mine forever.


3RD PLACE WINNER at the C/G Awards 2004 - Episode Addition, and 2ND PLACE WINNER at the Still the One Awards 2006 - Episodic
The keeper of lonelinesswanderlonely on March 11th, 2008 03:41 pm (UTC)
The fis is the first few ones of GC fics that I print them as my bed stories and every time I read it, I love it more, it's just sweet and beautiful. ♥
a.: cuddy; is blushingregalish on March 12th, 2008 06:05 pm (UTC)
Awww! *blushes* Thank you so much sweetie! I'm so thrilled to hear you still enjoy this one after all this time :)