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07 June 2007 @ 10:04 pm
Being A Donaghy [30 Rock; Jack/Liz]  
TITLE: Being A Donaghy
CHAPTER 8: Word Vomit
FANDOM: 30 Rock
PAIRING: Jack/Liz
SPOILERS: Through "Corporate Crush"
RATING: PG
SUMMARY:


*****

Liz sighed heavily... slowly... and dangled her legs over the edge of her queen-sized mattress. Her feet were swinging childishly in errant patterns (a perfect complement to her sweet pink PJ's with the lollipop-and-peppermint design), and her hands were clasped in her lap while she stared at the back of her closed bedroom door. Or rather... at the wedding dress hanging off the back of the door.

The wedding was tomorrow afternoon, now. What the hell had happened to those two weeks Jack had promised her? She looked down and putzed with her newly-polished fingernails, then wiggled her toes, showing off her pedicure. Jenna had insisted that they get their nails done for the wedding; even though Liz reminded her about a billion times that it wasn't a big deal. It wasn't even (technically) a real wedding. Kinda.

She nervously twisted the engagement ring on her finger, stomach somersaulting as she wondered for the millionth time in the past few weeks what the hell was wrong with her. What had she gotten herself into? A month ago, she was happy as a clam (even though she'd never understood that metaphor -- how can you tell if clams are happy or not?); she had been with Floyd, she'd been having regular sex and had been going out -- actually leaving her apartment and going out on dates.

Now, she was less than 24 hours away from jumping head-first into a loveless marriage (with her boss, which was still pretty weird and insane that neither of them were going to get fired for it) where there would be absolutely no sex, of any kind, and no dates.

Her stomach was past somersaulting now. It had taken a damn swan dive right past her feet and through the floor. Liz stood up, clutching her stomach with one hand, and one of the four thick mahogany bed posts with the other. She kind of wanted to throw up; maybe it'd take her mind off of all the wedding craziness.

On her way stumbling to the bathroom (with one hand over her eyes trying to ward off the oncoming migraine), Liz crashed into a warm body... a warm body with warm hands that reached out and caught her by the arms before she could fall back. "Lemon?"

Everything came tumbling out of her, then, like some kind of unstoppable... word vomit. "Jack, I'm freaking out," she whined, rubbing her forehead with her eyes squinted shut. "I got myself into something that I can't handle, and everything's happening so fast.. everything's happening tomorrow, and I just can't... I can't..."

"Shh, shh, okay... it's alright," he soothed in his low (seriously -- not sexy at all, no way) voice. He gently clasped her arm and steered her toward the master bedroom. "Come in here, we'll talk."

"I feel like I'm going to throw up," she complained, grimacing as she headed straight for his bed (a king-sized four-poster -- it was actually pretty nice) and crawled onto it, curling into a ball.

She completely missed the slightly-panicked look on Jack's face. "I'll, uh... I'll get you a trash can. Those sheets have a very high thread count, so I'd prefer it if you directed your vomit someplace else."

"What am I doing, Jack?" she whimpered into the woven silk bedspread. "What the hell am I doing?"

"You are doing me a tremendous favor, Lemon, and I appreciate it. You should relax, you just have cold feet. It happens to everyone."

"But... oh God, a loveless marriage? What am I, my parents?"

"A loveless marriage is better than a hateful marriage," Jack responded quietly, sagely.

Liz slowly sat up, furrowing her brow at the sincerity in his tone. When she sat up, he was sitting right next to her, their shoulders exchanging warmth. For once, she didn't feel the urge to bolt. "Were your parents in a marriage like that?"

He smiled halfway, faintly. "When I was two, my father had already left. My own picture of their marriage was gleaned from things said by my brothers and sisters."

"Was it bad?"

Jack kept staring straight ahead at the wall (where his tux was hanging, and Liz felt another pang of "Oh God") and responded, "My father was an Irish alcoholic and my mother had an acid tongue. It doesn't take a genius to guess what arguments turned into."

Liz nodded slowly, feeling a wave of sympathy for Jack for the first time. "Yeah."

She looked up when she felt his eyes on her; they were tracing her face, and... maybe it was late, but... it didn't creep her out like it normally did. "I'm sorry I had to drag you into this mess the fireworks show created. I just want my microwaves back."

Liz nodded. "I know."

"And... we may not be in love with each other, but at least we don't hate each other."

She chuckled a bit. "Right. There's the silver lining... I guess."

"And I know this is all pretend to you, Lemon, but this is a real marriage to me," he told her honestly, "and I'm going to treat it as such."

Liz made a face, growing slightly uncomfortable again. Where was that trash can Jack had promised? "O... kay..."

"I'll always do my best to keep you as comfortable as I can, not to mention you'll have full access to all the money you could ever--"

She held up a hand to stop him. "That's not important to me, Jack. Really."

"Fair enough. But most of all, Lemon... Elizabeth..."

When Jack grasped her hand she jumped slightly, exhaling shakily, "Oh boy," and meeting his eyes.

He held her gaze. "I'll always keep your best interests in mind for however long we happen to be tied to each other, and I'll always respect you."

Liz watched him for a long moment, trying to discern any sarcasm in his words. But what she found was genuine; Jack meant what he said. "Thanks, Jack."

He nodded, but said nothing. Then, they sighed in unison, and stared ahead at Jack's tuxedo. After what felt like an hour, he dropped her hand and patted her knee. "Feeling better?"

"Yeah, actually." She managed a smile... small, but genuine. "I don't think I'll throw up."

She turned to see his slight smile in response. "Well, good. Besides, I think what you really need is some sleep. We've got a big day tomorrow."

Liz smiled ruefully and rose slowly to her feet. "Don't remind me. Please."

"It'll be fine, you'll see. But..." He caught her by the forearm just as she'd reached the door, and he turned her around. "There is something I should warn you about ahead of time."

Liz just stared silently at him, her stomach doing that somersaulting thing again. Maybe she'd vomit after all. "Okay..."

"There will be a lot of GE executives at the reception, so we do kind of have to... act, a little bit."

Liz felt a brief urge to remind him that he was a terrible actor, but she managed to hold back. "Alright..."

"So we'll need to play the part of happy newlyweds. If I put my arm around you, I'd appreciate it if you wouldn't flinch." As an afterthought, he added, "Or gag."

Liz nodded her understanding. "I won't, I promise."

"And if I kiss you, I'd appreciate--"

"Whoa, wait. What?" Her eyebrows climbed her forehead. "You're going to kiss me?"

Jack shrugged, nonchalance on his features as if a kiss was no big deal. "Well, I'm not planning on it, Lemon, but if the moment calls for it, I might."

She opened her mouth to respond (though with what, she wasn't sure -- what the hell do you say in response to that?) and Jack, probably sensing her apprehension, beat her to it.

"Before you ask, no we won't have to worry about the guests tapping their forks on their champagne flutes." He shook his head. "I've always found that tradition a tad obnoxious, so I'm having Jonathan inform everyone ahead of time not to do that."

Liz let out some of her breath. "Okay. Thank you, Jack."

He smiled and placed his hands on her shoulders. "See? I'm trying to make you as comfortable as possible."

Liz just nodded mutely, letting her eyes show their gratitude.

Jack patted her shoulders. "Well... goodnight."

On a whim, before she could get away, he leaned down and pecked her cheek. Her smile was awkward, maybe a little nervous as she lamely waved and turned to head back to her room. And even though, once inside her room, she wiped his kiss off her cheek... she didn't gag. Maybe that was a good thing.

She laid back and turned out the light, thinking back on that split-second kiss, and decided it could also be a very bad thing. She shut her eyes tight and tried not to think (or dream) about it.




TBC



{x-posted to 30_rock and jack_liz}
 
 
 
Une Frakkante Cylonne: SyVa- bath comfort- almukkasunshine_queen on June 8th, 2007 03:56 am (UTC)
HEE.

"I'd appreciate it if you wouldn't flinch." As an afterthought, he added, "Or gag."

Perfect.
a.: D/E; just me and you;regalish on June 8th, 2007 11:24 pm (UTC)
Hehehe! Thanks! :D
tasha svetabitingbedbugz on June 8th, 2007 06:00 am (UTC)
Yay, a kiss, we got a kiss ^^

She looked up when she felt his eyes on her; they were tracing her face, and... maybe it was late, but... it didn't creep her out like it normally did. "I'm sorry I had to drag you into this mess the fireworks show created. I just want my microwaves back."

Microwaves back. Somehow makes me think of a little boy. xD
a.: J/L; the only thing i know i feel is youregalish on June 9th, 2007 12:59 am (UTC)
*giggle*

Thank you muchly, dearest! Jack is quite the little boy, isn't he? ;D
Miamie: 30 Rock- Liz and Jackcsi_miamie126 on June 8th, 2007 01:05 pm (UTC)
An "awwww" chapter. And to think I was also feeling a bit queasy during reading it! Heehee!

Shh, shh, okay... it's alright," he soothed in his low (seriously -- not sexy at all, no way) voice. Oh yes. I loves me the Liz denial.

I just want my microwaves back Hmmm. YouTube+Microwaves+Jack. OT3.

And yes! We did get a kiss! BOOYAH!

Loves you. *hugs* Keep it up!



a.: B/B; you're so close;regalish on June 9th, 2007 01:31 am (UTC)
*love & hugs back* HEEE. You are made of win; your reviews put a big, huge idiot grin on my face every single time! Hahahaha.

I'm pretty much in love with writing the Liz denial concerning Jack's (not sexy at all, nope -- uh-uh) voice. :D :D :D

And YES. Jack + microwaves + YouTube = OT3. FTW.

That's what your mom said to me last night. BOOYAH.

*gigglesnort* More to come sooooooon!
Miamiecsi_miamie126 on June 10th, 2007 04:34 am (UTC)
We CAN make icons out of fic quotes, yes? Or is that some huge copyright infringement thingy we need to look out for?

P.S. It's because your dialogues are in character, we can imagine them saying that anytime in the show. *eyebrow raise* MAYBE YOU ARE A WRITER FOR 30 ROCK! Hmmmm.
a.: A; nothing comes easily;regalish on June 10th, 2007 09:49 pm (UTC)
Hahah! Well, I've never heard of fic quote icons, but that would be quite a concept, wouldn't it? LOLOL.

And I'd kill to be a writer for 30 Rock. (Except, Tina Fey does a pretty darn good job! I'll just let her do it.)

:D
Miamiecsi_miamie126 on June 11th, 2007 07:33 am (UTC)
Then, I would request for permission to use bits of your fic for fic icons. I've made one, actually. Can't post it yet because photobucket is ganging up on me.

BTW. B.A.D is good.
a.: L; and sharp as a tack;regalish on June 11th, 2007 03:57 pm (UTC)
Awesome! Just as long as you make sure to credit me & the fic for the quotes (a link to the fic would be awesome too; could help me get in more readers), I'm fine with it. Can't wait to see what you come up with!

*squee* My fic will be immortalized in icons! EEEEEhehehe.
Uther Pendragon's Loyal Wench: jack and liz blacktiefirthgal on June 8th, 2007 03:42 pm (UTC)
Such a squee-worthy chapter, loved it! Can't wait for the wedding!
a.: J/L; night and day you are the one;regalish on June 9th, 2007 01:35 am (UTC)
Hehe, thanks much! Hope you enjoy the next chapter as well :D
(Anonymous) on June 8th, 2007 04:04 pm (UTC)
Great Chapter ,You have cheer up my dreadful and stressful Friday morning(I hate work), Jack is gonna kiss "Elizabeth" Weeee!!! , pls,pls,pls update soon
a.: J/L; she is everything i needregalish on June 9th, 2007 02:13 am (UTC)
Thanks so much! Glad I was able to perk up your day (I SO know what you mean about Fridays @ work, lol!).

I promise to update soon :D
majandratoomajandratoo on June 8th, 2007 04:46 pm (UTC)
Yes! Hah. I knew it was gonna be a happy Friday! And this was completely charming.
It struck me during this chapter that Jack reminds me a lot of Brendan Frasier's character in a movie called "Blast From the Past"? Don't know if you have seen it, but something about the way that Jack is so formal and gentlemanly and... well, honorable, is so very 1950's.

Also, the high thread count bit was spot-on, and I love that Liz hadn't even considered that they might have to kiss at the wedding. hee!

"A loveless marriage is better than a hateful marriage," Jack responded quietly, sagely.
*melts*
a.: M; and i'm your favorite doll;regalish on June 9th, 2007 02:16 am (UTC)
Hehe! Thanks a ton, as always!

Funny you should mention "Blast From the Past" (which I haven't seen, but I've heard it's totally cute!) and the fifties.... that's exactly how I see Jack.

I've noticed it all throughout my viewing of season one -- his penchant for wearing tuxes after six, the martinis; just the way that he talks, and his mannerisms and movements screams of a Rat Pack, fifties-ish influence.

I'll touch on that in later chapters :D
stephen@charleneforever.com: 30 rock: jack/liz (and arm touch)michellek on June 9th, 2007 12:02 am (UTC)
This chapter just made me giddy with its adorableness. (I thought I was making up a word, but spellcheck didn't flag it.) But, anyway. I just love how they are together. And:

She completely missed the slightly-panicked look on Jack's face. "I'll, uh... I'll get you a trash can. Those sheets have a very high thread count, so I'd prefer it if you directed your vomit someplace else."

"So we'll need to play the part of happy newlyweds. If I put my arm around you, I'd appreciate it if you wouldn't flinch." As an afterthought, he added, "Or gag."


Oh, Jack. I love you as much as I can love a fictional dude.
a.: L; i am extraordinary;regalish on June 9th, 2007 02:19 am (UTC)
Adorableness is a word??? SWEET. I've used that word for years; glad to know it passes the "spellcheck test" :D

And heeee, Jack. He is getting increasingly fun to write. Just you wait ;)

Also, when will we see YOUR next Jack/Liz fic, missy? Hehehe.
stephen@charleneforever.com: 30 rock: vampires = great golfersmichellek on June 12th, 2007 04:38 am (UTC)
Soon! I'm going through the tweaking/editing process on something. :) Which I may have mentioned, but it's getting closer to being done.
a.: J/L; i find it easier to sit and stare;regalish on June 12th, 2007 06:56 pm (UTC)
SQUEE!! I'm so excited! Now I'll have to keep an eye on the 30 Rock communities to make sure I don't miss it! Can't wait! :D
Tallymusical_junkie on June 10th, 2007 09:27 pm (UTC)
Amazing. Again.
I don't know what else to say but I loved it. So much.
a.: L; your angel standing by;regalish on June 10th, 2007 09:51 pm (UTC)
Aww, thank you so much! It means so much that all of you guys keep coming back for more of this fic. And that you're still enjoying it! It is continually an inspiration :)

Chapter nine goes up tonight!
30rocker30rocker on November 1st, 2008 06:24 pm (UTC)
LOVED this chapter!!
And here's what I loved most!!
1. Liz thinking about metaphors.
2. Liz having word vomit.
3. "his low (seriously -- not sexy at all, no way) voice"
4. Jack just wanting his microwaves back
5. "Fair enough. But most of all, Lemon... Elizabeth..."

When Jack grasped her hand she jumped slightly, exhaling shakily, "Oh boy," and meeting his eyes.

He held her gaze. "I'll always keep your best interests in mind for however long we happen to be tied to each other, and I'll always respect you."

Liz watched him for a long moment, trying to discern any sarcasm in his words. But what she found was genuine; Jack meant what he said. "Thanks, Jack." (MAJOR SQUEE!!!!)

This story is so cute and sweet and adorable!!