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10 January 2008 @ 03:11 pm
A Little Ditty About Jack (and Diana) [30 Rock; Jack/Liz]  
TITLE: A Little Ditty About Jack (and Diana)
FANDOM: 30 Rock
PAIRING: Jack/Liz
SPOILERS: Series
RATING: PG
SUMMARY:


*****

Liz has been crying for two hours straight now, even though she can see on the screen that as usual, things turned out great for Han and Leia. Because she's not crying over Han and Leia. She's crying over her own version of Han Solo.

They're probably just getting to the reception hall right now. And Jenna's probably already hammered and waiting for the bouquet to be thrown. And Tracy's probably hooked up with at least three or four people by now. And Pete's probably having an affair with his wife in the coat check room. And then here's Liz, crying alone on her couch in her office.

Maybe she wouldn't be in this bad of shape if she'd watched Tootsie instead. Because Tootsie doesn't have a gigantic, star-crossed (figuratively and literally-speaking) romance like Han and Leia's. It's Han and Leia doing this to her. Well, alright - Han and Leia compounded with the fact that she's still in love with Jack and that he still moved on from her and is having a big fancy wedding day today.

The floor of her office is littered with crumpled Kleenex and she wonders how she'll ever face him again. How she'll face him when he returns all starry-eyed from his honeymoon (Paris - and what is it with that guy and Paris?), how she'll face him when he inevitably becomes a first-time father. And how she'll face him after she's murdered his wife and will be hauled off to jail.

Whoa, stop with that train of thought. She has to scene-select the part where Han comes out of the carbonite and Leia kisses him just to erase the homicidal thoughts.

Maybe this wouldn't be so bad if she was watching 'Tootsie' and if Jack's new bride wasn't so damned... nice. Diana. Liz really wanted to hate her -- tried and tried for two whole days. But she was nice. And smart. And a brunette with glasses and a decent pair of boobs. Honestly, it was kinda like looking at herself. So of course Liz loved her. And Jack was happy.

She didn't remember him being all that happy when they were together. He'd start to be happy and romantic but then Liz would inevitably stomp all over it. When he proposed to her (in Paris) and she said yes, Jack was insanely happy for a full hour. But after that first hour of her engagement, the panic set in. She freaked out, gave the ring back to Jack and told him she couldn't do it. She flew back to New York just a couple hours later with the promise they'd talk when he came back from Paris. They never did.

A few weeks after things had just... stopped... between them, Jack met Diana. And she made him happy in ways Liz never could. She didn't scold him when he tried to hold her hand, and she (probably, she's just guessing) didn't fake headaches sometimes to get out of sex. Diana just... dated him, and made him happy, and promised to marry him and kept that promise.

Maybe Liz wouldn't feel so bad if everyone else hated Diana, but there was nothing about her to hate. Frank even burst into "Jack and Diane-...a" every time mention of her was made. And maybe she wouldn't feel so bad if she didn't know that they were probably sitting down to dinner at the reception right now.

"Lemon..." She hears her last name and looks up at Harrison Ford's face on the screen, certain it had been him. Certain it wasn't who she feared (hoped) it was.

"Lemon."

When she hears it again she's forced to turn her head toward the door, where Jack is standing in his tuxedo, leaning on the doorframe with his hands in his pockets. Suddenly she wishes she weren't sitting in the dark crying at Return of the Jedi in an office where the floor is littered with Kleenex. "Jack."

He just looks at her, studies her face, and... is she supposed to say something first?

"What are you doing here?"

She thinks she knows... hopes she knows... but doesn't want to be disappointed. So she waits with bated breath and watches him amble slowly into her office; watches him sit down on the opposite end of the couch from her. Instinctively, not knowing what she'd do if physical contact was made, she draws her legs up to her chest and wraps her arms around them, her chin on her knee.

Liz looks down at Jack's hands, resting in his lap, her eyes focusing on his ring finger. His empty ring finger.

"I couldn't do it." He looks up at her slowly. "I could not bring myself to marry Diana."

"Why?" Again, she hopes she knows the answer to this, but doesn't want to assume. Jack's far too unpredictable for assumptions of any kind.

Jack chuffs, not meeting her eyes, and she's never experienced this before. Jack's never been afraid to meet anyone's eyes. Except, inexplicably, Kristin Chenoweth. She still needs to ask him about that, because what's so terrifying about Cheno?

"Ideally, things would have worked out perfectly between Diana and myself. She was smart, lovely, kind, not after my money, and she made me happy."

Liz ducks her head and tucks a few strands of hair behind her ear.

"It should have been a match made in heaven." Then Jack looks up at her, through her, rather and she hates when he does that. "But... she wasn't you."

She sucks in a breath while Jack shakes his head at himself.

"And that, as I've learned today... was the deal-breaker."

Liz lets go of her legs, and moves just a little bit (one, or maybe six inches) closer to Jack. "What?"

Jack takes her hand and though her heart jumps, she doesn't break away. He watches their hands as if fascinated by the fit, and massages her knuckles with his thumb. "I'm still in love with you, Liz. Quite possibly, I will always be in love with you. I tried to make myself happy with Diana, because I deserve to be happy."

Liz had no argument there. She'd treated him horribly and regrets every time she ever shied away from his affection or rolled her eyes at any gesture of romance.

"And she certainly resembled you closely enough. The brown hair, the glasses, the nearly-identical breasts..."

Liz wishes she'd gone temporarily deaf for that part, but keeps listening anyway.

"But she was a poor substitute for the real thing." He smiles at her and it rips her heart into shreds because it's so damnedably gorgeous.

If he asked her to marry him right here, today, she'd say yes. Ask her. Ask her. "Liz, I know you're against stereotypical romance and you'd rather spend money on a wedding dress you'll never wear than--"

"Yes," she blurts without even thinking about it.

Jack's confusion is all-too-evident in the way his lips purse and his eyebrows inch up his forehead. "Yes... what?"

She bites her lip. "I... uh, sorry, I thought you were asking me to marry you."

"Lemon, I'm seconds out of nearly getting married. Why would I propose to someone again? And as I said not thirty seconds ago, you won't ever want to get married. You don't need to change that about yourself and you shouldn't have to. We can date... forever... without solid commitment if it would make you happy. And even if I spend the rest of my life in a Kurt-Russell-and-Goldie-Hawn'esque courtship, never taking that final plunge into legally-recognized matrimony, I'm okay with that. Your happiness is what matters most to me, Lemon."

Her mouth wants her to say things now, so she hopes her brain can catch up. "I've been sitting here crying because I thought you were getting married today." She has to keep going before he says more things that make her fall even more in love with him. "And stupidly, it's because I wished you were getting married to me. Which is ironic and even more stupid, because I'm the one that called off our engagement and ended things."

"You weren't ready."

"You're wrong. I was ready, and that's what freaked me out. I was so ready. Standing there at the base of the freaking Eiffel Tower with a goddamn seven-thousand-dollar Tiffany ring on my finger, I was ready. I was ready to be married and start having babies and doing all the things that the feminist in me never wanted to do. And it was so scary, I freaked out and gave you the ring back."

Jack squeezes her hand and she wishes he was holding her. So she scoots a little closer and he takes the hint. Her head finds his chest and she closes her eyes as the pure familiarity of it momentarily overwhelms her. "Jack, I spent the next three weeks - up until you met Diana - convincing myself that I didn't want any of those things, that it was just Paris, or just the sparkle off the diamonds, or whatever making me think that I was ready when I really wasn't."

"And then Diana came along," he prompts, and Liz wonders for a split-second what Diana thinks of this whole thing -- about her wedding day being destroyed, about her and Jack, about any of it.

"Yeah. Diana came along, being all... like me, but being like a me that actually made you happy and I realized that I really did want all of those things. But I kinda thought I was too late."

"Lemon, a snap of your fingers would've been enough to get me to drop Diana."

He kisses her then, and Liz is once again overwhelmed by the familiarity -- familiarity that she'd been missing like crazy for the last three months. She should've known, when she started this thing with Jack in the first place, that it'd be impossible to get him out of her system.

The makeup sex is good -- great, even, despite it taking place on the kleenex-littered couch in her office -- and when it's all over and she's tucked into Jack's side and he's tickling up and down her arm with his fingertips, he speaks again. "Diana said she had known all along that this would happen."

"That we'd get back together, and then have sex on my couch with Return of the Jedi playing?"

"Well..." Jack helps her tie her sweatpants again before he resituates his own (only half-removed) clothing. "Just that we'd get back together. I hardly think she'd be clairvoyant enough to predict the latter portion of that statement."

"Really? She knew we'd get back together?"

"As we were saying our goodbyes at the church, she told me that she could see it every time I would so much as look at you. That really she was kidding herself this whole time."

"Wow." Liz can't help but sigh. "God, even when you're dumping her at the altar she's still nice. What is her problem?"

Jack laughs and kisses her again, and for the first time in three months, Liz is happy. They'll be okay.


FIN


{x-posted to 30_rock and jack_liz}
 
 
 
meganp6 on January 11th, 2008 12:16 am (UTC)
OMG!!!! Our girl is back! I missed your fics soooooooooooooo much!!! Seriously!!!!
a.: jack/liz; a decent setregalish on January 15th, 2008 11:10 pm (UTC)
Hehe! Thanks, sweetie! I do often miss writing Jack/Liz. It's too bad that darned muse wants me to be everywhere at once. ;D
lovely surprise: {Tina} Smart Is Sexygirlie_girl_23 on January 11th, 2008 12:22 am (UTC)
*FLAILS*

DAMN YOU WOMAN! HOW DO YOU DO THIS?! AJKLFDJAFLKDAHG! I DON'T EVEN WATCH THIS SHOW REGULARLY AND YOU'VE GOT ME ALL FLAILY AND FREAKING OUT ABOUT THIS! AJFKDJALFKJALGH!

Seriously, this was SO GOOD! Just, poor Liz, all crying, and Jack coming in, and... oh beautiful romance, I love you!

And OMG the comment about Cheno about made me pee my pants! Hahahahaha! Winnn!

No, but seriously babe, this was fantastic! I love it, I love it, I love it!

Oh yeah... and I LOVE YOU!

a.: tina; naughtyregalish on January 15th, 2008 11:13 pm (UTC)
HA! YAAAAAAAAAAAAAY. MATT AND I CAN BOTH JUMP FOR JOY NOW. WE WILL TURN YOU INTO A RABID 30 ROCK FAN. WE WILL.

I'm so excited that you took the time to read this, despite not being super familiar with the fandom!! That means so much to me, really. I have such a thing for once-together-now-broken-up Jack and Liz. Probably because we'll never see it, LOL.

HAHAHA glad you like the remark about Cheno! I thought it'd be hilarious if he were afraid of someone as tiny and precious as Cheno. :D

*jumps for joy* YOU LIKED IT! YAAAAAY.

Oh, also... I LOVE YOU TOOOOO!

lovely surprise: {House} F Me Pumpsgirlie_girl_23 on January 17th, 2008 04:47 am (UTC)
Yes, I'm sure between the two of you, I will become a rabid fan as well. *giggles*

And of course I read this! I read like, everything you write, as long as I semi-know the fandom. DUH! And okay, that thing about once-together-now-broken-up totally reminds me... I have a new fic idea. (Like I need another one). And we haven't talked in ages it feels like! Are you gonna be around tomorrow? I wanna pitch it to you and see what you think. *grins*

I loved the Cheno remark! And the Goldie Hawn/Kurt Russell one too! I just forgot to mention that! And seriously, the Cheno one, it seems so much like something that would happen on the show that I was like, "OMG WHEN DID THEY REFERENCE CHENO?!".

I LOVE YOU MOOOORE!

csiAngel: 30 Rock J/Lcsiangel on January 11th, 2008 09:38 pm (UTC)
Awww. An angsty, beautiful fic. Such an eye-watering image of Liz amongst the kleenex watching Return of the Jedi crying. I could picture the whole thing, particularly Jack's arrival and the ensuing conversation - the moving gradually closer. This is beautiful. It made me cry. And I love it! And you!
a.: liz; beautyregalish on January 15th, 2008 11:14 pm (UTC)
Aww, thanks Jac! I'm normally not one to associate angst with Jack and Liz, but... this just poured out. I'm glad you enjoyed it :)

(HAD to include Return of the Jedi too, because... come on!)

And heee, I love you too! ♥
stephen@charleneforever.com: 30 rock: jack/liz & stairsmichellek on January 12th, 2008 12:56 am (UTC)
Aww, I ♥ this so much.
a.: jack/liz; 10 secondsregalish on January 15th, 2008 11:28 pm (UTC)
Hehe, thanks! Glad you enjoyed :)
NMnm42 on January 12th, 2008 04:23 am (UTC)
"That we'd get back together, and then have sex on my couch with Return of the Jedi playing?"

Ahahah HELL YEA! Sorry after my whole adolescent term of words, but this was a really good touchy-Jack-Liz-ish story. It was so them and yet completely heart-warming
a.: jack/liz; with just a touchregalish on January 15th, 2008 11:29 pm (UTC)
Yay, thank you so much! I'm happy you liked this; it's not my usual Jack/Liz, but I had fun with this one :)

And LOL that was my fave line to write, so I'm glad you got a kick out of that.
Jay Auris: Happynighthawkms on January 12th, 2008 07:32 am (UTC)
This is so FREAKING adorable! Perfectly captured everyone's personalities yet again, and the storyline is pretty unique and interesting. Awesome job!
a.: jack/liz; a decent setregalish on January 15th, 2008 11:31 pm (UTC)
HEEEE, thanks so so much! Glad you liked this; I was in the mood for doing a bit of angst, but I still wanted to keep them the same 'ole Jack and Liz :D

And I'm fairly intrigued with the idea of Jack and Liz getting together, but breaking up and still being in love with each other. So, this pretty much wrote itself, hehe!
Miamiecsi_miamie126 on January 18th, 2008 11:23 am (UTC)
Dude! Return! Make-up sex! Kleenex! Jack/Liz!

*Hugs you to death* Yayness and squee. How do you do it, tsk tsk. A mystery, and I am gonna solve you, yes I is.

I love this fic. On to the printer! For posterity! For a way to keep awake during classes!
courtney_mudie7: wrong ideacourtney_mudie7 on January 22nd, 2008 11:57 am (UTC)
Then Jack looks up at her, through her, rather and she hates when he does that. "But... she wasn't you."

my fave line!! omg! such awesomeness!! *g*
I work, I function like i'm a girl.: spoilers=lj cutokelay on March 9th, 2008 04:06 am (UTC)
awww, this was great
very realistic and i really liked the last line